The Chicago area has several hundred suburbs. Why not have dozens of them submit proposals to the Chicago Bears for a stadium and surrounding development? If the goal is to get the most tax breaks and make the most money, this is how Amazon and other large firms operate.

Here is one satirical look at some options:

Winnetka

Cheap Uber rides to the stadium for the McCaskeys from their North Shore abodes. Every dollar saved counts…

Blue Island

A local referendum changing the town’s name to “Black and Blue Island” could seal the deal. Fans would travel from remote parking lots to the stadium via a scenic barge ride on the Little Calumet River…

Batavia

In conjunction with nearby Fermilab, America’s particle physics and accelerator laboratory, the Bears could find the answers to two of life’s eternal questions: How did the universe begin? and Why can’t the Bears win another Super Bowl?…

Downers Grove

The Bears already have been a downer for many years. Just make it official by building a retractable DownersDome.

The Chicago area is large and there are plenty of possible sites for a stadium. And for most fans, the view of the game on TV will look the same regardless of where the stadium is located.